Nitole_lynn (nitole_lynn) wrote,

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Did out what you want, they say??? OL ok that sounds easy

Urgh uh grumble grumble that is what I have felt the last two days. I mean for the love of god. I have done fucked up again. I sit here and ponder and ponder and fight with myself. I am sick about it. I completely just cut roy off about 12 days ago. I just avoided his phone calls, didn't answer his texts and then he eventually said Fuck off. Which granted, I deserve that. Well now low and behold, he is going to be in town all of a sudden. He supposedly has a family emergency that I don't know what is going on either. Damn it. I hate myself. Why did I do this and just act like he didn't matter. One second I got it all figured and know that I want to be with him forever and do that whole life thing, the next not so much. I am sorry I am not trying to be funny I am really going nuts. my head hurts
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